Seriously…I had no idea. I am addicted to the white stuff…no not cocaine (so 1990’s)…sugar silly (The new Drug of Choice…DOC). And I think it’s been killing me softly for a looooooong time. I always thought it was kind of funny that I loved ice cream so much. Maybe in my head I could justify eating a whole point of Ben & Jerry’s is OK (and believe me…there have been more than enough times in my life when it was OK…)…you know how it goes: you are eating along and you hit a huge pocket of goodness..it’s a bit farther than the place you told yourself you were going to stop…but what the hell…it’s only one more bite…and before you know it you are rationalizing the whole pint gone…”I just need to level this spot off…and then I’ll stop.” And it’s no secret to the whole FREAKIN world that there are 4 servings in a pint. Who’s got next pint? So this has never happened to you huh? Yeah…me neither. Welllllll…it has happened a lot.
I always thought it was kinda wierd that my wife could stop after just one bite or stop going back to the cookie jar after just one cookie. Feminine willpower? How about chocolate chips? If there is a bag open in the house…it won’t be in the house long….trust me. Cookies? Gone. Ice Cream…you read the first paragraph…gone.
I am 40…and over the last holiday season this all came down for me. Like the last two weeks…and no this is not a resolution phase. I am a bit freaked out. I was reading along on Facebook when a man I respect posted an article about being sugar-free and living longer. One of his comments was about “listening to what your body needed for food” and I had no clue about what he meant. This was foreign to me. For someone who had trained in athletics, in bodywork, in physiology…this was foreign territory…and what was weird was I knew it. So I posted back and asked for a reference. He suggested “Potatoes Not Prozac” so I called the library…not in…but on order. I googled it and found a few resources till the book came in. One source that struck me hard was a free E-Book on sugar addiction. It’s free…what the hell? So I read it. It’s funny the words that the author was saying jolted me a bit…like everything she was saying happened to me…except the eating disorders…I just over ate and kept it all down.
After reading the book I was standing at the sink looking out our back window and started thinking about sugar…the part about my wife being able to stop eating ice cream or candy…friends stopping whenever they wanted..it all seemed like they had magical will power…and I was possessed by something else….my own rationalizations (it’s no big deal…it’s just chocolate)…my own procrastinations (I’ll be good tomorrow…). About a year ago I was at a conference talking with a friend at a food table. I had a piece of chocolate cake in my mouth and she asked if it “tasted good?” I said “No…it didn’t” and she took it from me and asked why I was eating it…I didn’t have an answer. That was a year ago. so now fast forward to my kitchen window…as I was standing there I took a huge bite of chocolate and the weirdest thing happened…it felt like every cell in my body vibrated at the smell of the chocolate…and then when it hit my lips and into my mouth my whole body sighed and then smiled. Like a whole body smile. I had never felt that before…never noticed that sensation. I was always shoving food in my mouth so fast that it never registered…never occurred, never made it to my brain. I have never been addicted to drugs but that’s what I imagine a hit feels like when you haven’t had it in a while…and it grossed me out (totally…for sure).
So where do we go from here? I dunno. Gonna keep reading the e-book (again) look at some more articles on the website and dive into Potatoes Not Prozac. Just from the short bit I have read so far it seems to encompass why I:
- Liked to drink so much in college
- Continued to overeat
- Have been battling a bit of depression for a long time (since high school)
- Why my joints hurt and feel swollen after eating some foods
- Move from food to food (if not bread then tortilla chips) to continue to feed that sugar craving.
- Why I recovered slower than my fellow athletes
- Why my body felt “inflammed” and tight with Plastic Wrap
- I am sure there are other sensations as well…..
What blows me away is what sugar is in…it’s in everything by the way…everything you may buy at a store…check the label it might be killing you too
There is a lot of …pauses…in this post, but tell me what you think anyway…Charlie (Charlie@4seasonfitness.com)
BTW: I am not trying to be “Holier than thou” with this…it’s just information that has tripped me out a bit, but might be a one of the pieces of the puzzle that helps round out my life with a bit more enjoyment. No judgement on my part…seriously…I will love you just the same.
BTW2: I have always had an interest in nutrition…just never considered myself a “nutritionist” so this will be a bit of exploration on my part in strategy. Oh yeah and how do I set my kids up for success knowing this about myself…
Charlie Murdach www.4seasonfitness.com Portsmouth, New Hampshire 